Archive for Song
‘Jesus, Etc.’
I can remember when I first heard this song. It was not in 2002, when Yankee Hotel Foxtrot came out; it was two years later, 2004, living in a semi-unfinished basement room in a shared house with dysfunctional roommates. My mom and my friend and my friend’s dad came to help finish the room enough to live in–put up sheetrock, paint, clean, put in the bathroom fixtures (it had a tiny bathroom of its own). The room was so cheap. That’s why I took it. Two hundred dollars a month, you can’t say no. The walls were smooth and white, the floor was chipboard painted white, there was no ceiling, the closet had no door. But we rigged it so there was a light in there.
It was the second year of my (three-year) MFA. I had a single futon, a real, heavy, firm one from a family friend who’d gotten it from a Japanese shop some years earlier; I had a desk which had been made by hand in a highschool shop course half a century earlier. I had a lot of books. Along two sides of the long room, the wall had a shelf built into it. My books were there, beneath the large, south-west facing windows. A lot of light came into the room, more than I would ever have thought. And I had a large hanging lamp from a past life of my dad’s, a red half-moon shade with a white interior. I hung it over my desk, in the corner made by the wall and the closet, next to the windows. My little aluminum laptop, which I saved up to buy when I started grad school, sat on a typist’s stand spray-painted a bright blue.
There was a lot of confusion that year. I was twenty-four. I know now how difficult your early 20s can be. I didn’t know it then, I just assumed that things were crazy and confusing and impossible to see. I had no perspective. I was writing, teaching, swimming along with very little sense of navigation. I sensed currents and handled them poorly. Eh. That’s what you do.
This song, Jeff Tweedy’s voice–I can see myself very happily making things, writing things in that room. I can feel how possible everything seemed to me then, and even now I know that so much was possible. The song’s full of a longing I felt even then, for something which wasn’t there. In its fullest moments, happiest moments, still this sense of something not-there, a little too sweet, an ache just under the surface of things. A good one. It made me write. Looking back I cringe a little to think of how coltish I must have been in my interactions, in managing my relationships with other people. How naïve. But all right. There was also the circle of light from the lamp, and the bright white light of summer coming through eyelet curtains I sewed myself, the sound of Wilco and the stars, distances to cross and long ways to go. The song’s about the future, about the possible, what we can’t know.
change of time
I have loved this song for almost a year now, since last February. Josh Ritter, how do you keep writing the things I mean to write? This time it’s for a friend, Molly, who just had her first baby. I guess that’s a change of time all right.
playlist for an optimistic friday
…whether Girl or day.
1. “Holy Grail”, Badly Drawn Boy. You can listen to it here via Spotify/last.fm/etc. Why? Plain old feel-goodness, piano, kids’ choir, change of tempo about 1/2-way in. Sample lyric: “Do you know where we’re going to?/ Do you know what we will do when we arrive?/ As I wait for you to set sail/ don’t you know that I hope you find your holy grail.”
2. “More Adventurous”, Rilo Kiley. You can see them play it here. Why? Harmonica. Sample lyric: “I’ve heard with every broken heart/ We should become more adventurous”.
3. “Darkness between the Fireflies”, Mason Jennings. You can listen to it here. Why? It’s jangly and rough and awkward but somehow totally feels like I feel when stuff is just starting and it’s going to be good. Sample lyric: “Honey, I’m sure/ That you’ve been in love before/ Plenty other men have held high places in your eyes./ But jealousy/ Has got no use for me/ The past is beautiful like the darkness/ Between the fireflies”.
4. “By Your Side” (Sade cover), GAYNGS. You can see them play it here. Why? Because it’s a great love song. Sample lyric: “When you’re on the outside, baby, and you can’t get in/ I will show you, you’re so much better than you know./ When you are lost, when you’re alone/ And can’t get back again/ I will find you darlin’/ And bring you home”.
5. “Split Ends”, Ben Weaver. You can hear a live studio session (“Split Ends” is the third song) here. Why? Weaver’s voice is gorgeous–a little rough around the edges–and his lyrics are amazing, and his guitar-playing is pretty great, too. Sample lyrics: “How long’s it gonna take/ For the storm to cross the lake/ How long you gonna wait/ Like the trash in the park or a spider in the shower/ Fillin’ a jar with water for the flowers/ Almost washed away”.
6. “Futile Devices”, Sufjan Stevens. You can listen to it here. Why? This is the most ‘Sufjan-y’ track on the new album, The Age of Adz, but it’s tinged with some of the echo-y dreamscape of the rest of the album. It’s a great between point, not to mention that the mingling of the guitar and piano is beautiful. The whole album is enjoyable, though pretty different from his others, and you can listen to it on his site. Sample lyric: “It’s been a long long time since I’ve memorized your face/ It’s been four hours now since I’ve wandered through your place/ And when I sleep on your couch, I feel very safe”.
7. “This Must Be the Place” (Talking Heads cover), The Arcade Fire. You can see them play it here. Why? Ah, whoooo, if you have to ask I can’t explain it. This is just one of the greatest feel-good songs ever. I love the singer’s scratchy voice and the way it feels patchy and accidental. I love that it feels like IT WILL ALL BE OK. Sample lyric: “Love me til my heart stops/ Love me til I’m dead/ Eyes that light up/ Eyes that see through me”.
8. “1977″, Ana Tijoux. You can listen to it here (with lyrics) or download it here. Why? Because her flow is amazing! Ok, so thinking about the fact that this song is about the events of 1977 in Chile is not feel-good. But the song is powerful and gets me moving. And I like hearing ‘political’ work done well. Sample lyric: “Me hace llorar sin anestesia en la camilla/ Mi padre solo digo es Ana Maria”.
